A look back...

I joined Maghull Cricket Club in 2002.  As I write this, I can’t actually believe that it has been ten years.  I’ve had some wonderful times at the club, and fewer bad times.  I’ve played in the same sides as some of the best players Maghull has ever known, and I’m sure those legends of Hall Lane are just as thrilled to have played alongside me.  I’ve had the honour and pleasure to captain two teams, while serving as vice captain under three different captains.  During the period, I’ve had numerous off field roles, as well as managing the (as I write this) last U18 side Maghull had.

In this edition of my blog, I would like to share with any who read it my ten favourite matches from those ten years.  So, in no particular order (until we reach number one), here we go.

NLW (a) 3rds, Embee Trophy, W

Why Memorable? – Last cup match I won.  Also the best fielding display of my life.

HIGHLIGHT – Lloydy’s massive six onto the bowling green.  What a hit…

Northop Hall (a) 4ths, W

Why Memorable? – First time I won a match away from Parkhaven.  Also the 4ths were bowled out for 19 a mere month earlier against the same opponents.  Revenge is sweet…

HIGHLIGHT – Chally smoking two big sixes to win it for us.

Wavertree (a) 3rds, W

Why Memorable? – The 3rds clinched the 3^rd XI First Division Championship this day.  Grand team effort all season, culminating in a great victory.

HIGHLIGHT – John Comer battering his way to 56, whilst wearing sunglasses.

Lytham (h) 5ths, W

Why Memorable? – A great and dramatic victory for the 5ths, off the second last ball.

HIGHLIGHT – The performance of Mike Bell, 58 and 5-38.  Still the best all round performance in 5ths history.

St Helens (a) 5ths, L

Why Memorable? – We’d been bowled out for 75, but we came so close to pinching a victory.  St Helens finished 76-9.

HIGHLIGHT – Chall taking a wicket with the first ball of the innings.  Great in swinging Yorker.

Prestatyn (h) 5ths, W

Why Memorable? – Capped a great weekend.  Friday at York Races, Sunday a tense game for the 4ths at 

Sefton Park, then this game coupled with England regaining the Ashes.

HIGHLIGHT – We won by 54 runs.  My contribution was 54, including my first six for the 5ths.

Northop Hall (a) 3rds, W

Why Memorable? – The 3rds completed the Great Escape, avoiding relegation on the last last day.

HIGHLIGHT – The match winning partnership of 191 between Mikey Cummins and Craig Parkinson.

Ainsdale (h) 5ths, W

Why Memorable? – The 5ths first ever win.  My first as captain.

HIGHLIGHT – The epic 18 over stint by Jack Snowdon.  The first time he ever opened the bowling for the 5ths, he got 4-30.

St Helens Recs (h) 5ths, W

Why Memorable? – We defended 160 on a dusty track, against a team that were at that time heading for promotion.

HIGHLIGHT – Liam Symes took five wickets, and Parky finished unbeaten on 94* after I declared on him.

Colwyn Bay (a) 5ths, W

Why Memorable? – Colwyn Bay 3^rd XI hadn’t lost a home match for absolutely ages.  We rolled them for 119 on the best batting track in the County Game.  We recovered from 38-6 thanks to Liam Gibbons (49*) and Billy Symes (20).

HIGHLIGHT – Les Newbolds winning leg bye, Gibbos victory lap in his Winnie the Pooh boxers.  Simply the greatest game of cricket I will ever play in.

SOMETHING HAPPY

I'd like to introduce you to another good friend of mine, and a former work colleague, Mr Christopher Hughes.  I asked him to tell me some truths about the world we live in, especially the local world.  After careful thought, he came up with several reasons.  I have decided to break his offerings down, so here is the first part!

"I am an extremely angry and grumpy person. I have no patience and hate most people apart from my immediate family. Most things annoy me. I will write about them as and when I see fit. A weekly rant is quite possible in my life. This is my first one. Grammar might be shite but so what, I am writing as it comes out of my head.

Post Office Queues.

Lets get one thing straight. The demise of the Post Office is not a bad thing. I hate them. They are a completely pointless meeting point for geriatric, senile, stamp licking moth ball smelling old people. Don’t get me wrong, I respect old people. They have lived through the second world war, rationing and they never get divorced. Respect.

However. When you are in the Post Office; do what you need to do and then get out. Immediately. Every time I go in a PO, there are usually 6 or 7 old people in front of me. Joy as the “cashier number 2 please” rings out. Dismay at the fact that Mavis is now telling the 1 GCSE’d halfwit behind the counter her entire life story. Stop it. One such person made me queue for over 10 minutes as she bought a stamp. One single stamp. Then spent another 5 minutes counting out a bag of two pence pieces from a plastic money bag to pay for a stamp. She should have been shot for that. Then there are the morons asking about car tax. Should I get six or twelve months they ask. Why are you asking a thick cashier that? What do they know? My blood pressure goes up every time I step into the dreaded places. There is the case of pointless questions, scenario:

Cashier: “you need your insurance certificate”

Idiot “do I, are you sure” ?

This is repeated for about 10 minutes.

OF COURSE YOU NEED YOUR F*****G INSURANCE CERTIFICATE – NOW F*** OFF AND GO AND GET IT OR GET OUT. That is what should be said.

Avoid the places. They are harmful to your health.

Traffic Lights.

I’ll keep this short and sweet. The government bend us over every time we visit a petrol pump. Millions are spent on engine research, striving for the most economical design. Toyota Prius, electric cars etc.

SO PLEASE TELL ME WHY THE DICKHEADS WHO MAKE TRAFFIC LIGHTS MAKE ME STOP EVERY TIME FOR NOTHING, COME TO A COMPLETE STANDSTILL, THEN ACCELRATE BACK UP TO SPEED WHEN THE OTHER WAY IS CLEAR IN THE FIRST PLACE ? WHY IS THAT ? HAVE YOU ANY IDEA HOW MUCH FUEL THAT USES UP. F*** THE OZONE LAYER. ITS BOLLOCKS. IF IT WASN’T, THEY WOULD KNOW HOW TO MAKE A GREEN LIGHT COME ON AT THE CORRECT TIME. DICKHEADS.

Carpet Fitters.

We have had carpet fitted this week. All is well so far. Until the robbing bastards tell me that to ‘pull up’ the old stuff will cost me £50 extra. Yes, £50 to lift up some carpet. That will be in addition to the £200 + I am paying you.

Can you explain what the £50 breaks down into ? Considering the gruff voiced Neanderthal that ‘fitted’ the carpet can’t even count, I’m not sure it goes on his wages.

I asked some today to take away the old stuff that I had pulled up myself.

“Can’t mate, industrial waste”

You lying lazy bastard. I’ve just paid you £120 to fit a rug sized piece of carpet and you are refusing to bin the old rug for me?

Bastards.

Old Drivers.

We all hate them. Speeding is bad. So is doing 27mph in a 60.

Why is it that every time I’m in a hurry, a Yaris driving corpse pulls out in front of me? Gripping the wheel in sheer terror (at doing over 20mph), they have absolutely no sense of speed, distance or judgement. It is a crime that such people even possess a licence. Why have mirrors when you can just stare vacantly through the gap in the steering wheel and not have a flying fucking clue about any other road users? More often than not, these drivers display an “AA” or “RAC” badge on their grille. A sure sign that the driver smells of mothballs and wee.

I hate them.

They always pull out on me. Roundabouts are a near death experience if a Yaris driving corpse is oncoming. Forget your indicators. They don’t even look at them and probably can’t even see them. They just pull out. Then, you beep your horn having slammed on to avoid a collision and they don’t even turn their heads! They just grip the steering wheel tighter and continue, oblivious to everything in the entire world.

I know one day I will be killed by an old person driving a motor car. I’ll be on my bike and the last thing I’ll see is an “RAC” badge heading toward me at 26mph."

(Chris can be followed on Twitter under the name @chris_h_1982).

That's all for this week, but on Saturday I will be presenting a special Mock Draft produced by myself and my good friend Paul Mainwaring.  For the first and best (ahem...) idea of who the first 32 college players to be taken in April will be, give us a read!